Idiot mad after setting things on fire

Stupid story.

An imbecile is mad after doing an extremely stupid thing for idiotic reasons as the fallback from this moronic decision has led them to be "completely fucked off" as they did not expect their idiotic decision to have much of an effect on the wider world.

Jim Jamieson, 25, from Tipton is furious after setting his pubic hair on fire during his family's charity barbeque as a "funny joke" because he didn't expect it to hurt so much, burn his genitals and ruin a family friendly evening with people of all ages around. Jim claims that him and the lads thought it'd be entertaining as Jim needed to shave his nether regions anyway and that "it would be more efficient to burn it away as it save on cleaning up" but what Jim forgot was that his penis and and testicles were also in the vicinity of his pubic hair.

This led to Jim laughing for a grand total of 2 seconds before screaming as his penis became Chinese kebab and his balls started to become roasted scallops. Eyewitnesses report that Jim proceeded to pour alcoholic punch down his trousers which only worsened the flame before jumping in the children's paddling pool laid out for them. Expert doctors say that Jim's shaft is totally fucked but are glad that someone like him is no longer able to reproduce.

Jim plans to write to his local MP complaining about discrimination against those who have had their gentalia said on fire during all circumstances although the chances are that he'll be told to fuck off since this whole incident was self inflicted self-harm.